10 Things I Hate About You (Own Version)

I hate the way you treat me And the way you talk to me
I hate the thought that you're so far I hate it when you seem so free
I hate your bloody red nail polish And the way you kiss my arm
I hate you so much it makes me sick That it even makes me smile
I hate the way you're always tough I hate it when you're cold
I hate it when you make me laugh Even worse when you make me a fool
I hate the way you block me on facebook And the fact that you don't have time
But mostly, I hate the way I don't hate you Not even close Not even a little bit Not even at all

For this someone whom I used to know so well...8

????...

ayaw ko ang matulog
ayaw ding pumikit
ni ayaw maidlip
para bang sa aki'y bangungot ang kalakip

ayaw kong dumilat
ayaw ding gumising
takot sa katotohanang...
ako'y nahimlay na't wala sa iyong piling
gawa ng bangungot na sa aki'y kumitil

???

ngayon...
kasabay ng pagsikat ng araw
ang pagsambulat ng damdaming
naghihimutok...
naghuhumiyaw...

bunga ng mga panahon ng pananahimik
tila nagbabadya ng katapusan, ng wakas...
wakas na ni minsa'y hindi sumagi sa isipang
kailan lang ay musmos

kamusmusang patungo sa mapaglarong tadhana
tadhanang hindi inalintanang akin...

at...
sa aking mga kamay

ngayon ang araw ay hindi na muling masisilayan...

..I love You in spite of..

What hurts the most?..

When you can’t fight for that one thing that would make you happy...

I may never be the person you look forward to seeing every day but I will always be the person who will look out for you each and every day.. Men are haunted by the vastness of eternity and so we ask ourselves: Will our actions echo across the centuries? Will strangers hear our names long after we are gone, and wonder who we were, how bravely we fought, how fiercely we loved?

Love is when you can't sleep.. it’s when you want to keep your eyes open..
Love isn’t when you keep holding on.. it’s when you learn to let go..
Love isn’t when you kill yourself with jealousy.. it’s when you understand..
Love isn't when you fall for someone.. it’s when you catch that person when she falls.. Love isn’t when you see her everywhere.. it’s when you close your eyes and she is still there..
Love isn’t when you tell her what you feel.. it’s when you give everything for her sake.. And love isn’t when you think you were blind.. it’s when you know she was wrong but you didn’t mind.

..Smiling When All You Wanna Do is Cry..

"Most relationships fail not because of the absence of love. Love is always present...it's just that one loves too much and the other loves too many."

If I could ask God 1 thing, it would be "Are you destined for me?" if he says YES, then I'll love you even more! If he says NO then I'll continue to love you 'til I can make him agree that we're really meant to be..They say "Love is blind.." but in reality..LOVE IS NOT BLIND..it simply enables one to see things others fail to see!

I came upon fiftieth roman and nothing left except five inverted three and then YOU came last..

..Purest of Pain..

i'm sorry i didn't mean to call but i couldn't fight it
i guess i was weak couldn't even hide it
and so i surrender just to hear your voice
i know how many times
i said i'm gonna live without you
and maybe someone else is standing there beside you
but there's something baby that you need to know
that deep inside me i feel like i'm dying
i have to see you it's all that i'm asking

vida, give me back ny fantasies
the courage that i need to hear
the air that i breathe
cariño mio my world becomes so empty
my days are so cold and lonely
and each night i taste
the purest of pain

i wish i could tell you i'm feelin' better everyday
that it didn't hurt me when you walked away
but to tell you the truth i can't find my way
and deep inside me i feel like i'm dying
i have to see you it's all that i'm asking...

quisier a decirte que hoy estoy
de maravilla
que no me ha afectado lo de tu partida
pero con un dedo
no se tapa el sol
estoy muriendo
muriendo por verte
agonizando, muy lento y muy fuerte

vida, devuelve me mis fantasias
mis ganas de vivir la vida
devuelve me el ave
cariño mio, sintin yo me siento vacio
las tardes son un laberinto
las noches me sabes

a puro dolor

..Does Love Need A Reason?..

Don't love me for anything...You may love for a reason but let the reason be...

For a moment i closed my eyes...I contemplated on what could have been the answer. After a few seconds, I opened it...smiled...Ifound the answer - NO!

Logically speaking, there's a reason for everything. The reason why you cry is "you're sad". The reason why you laugh is "you're happy". The reason why you eat is "you're hungry". and the reason why you drink is "you're thirsty". There's more...so much more...

A few days ago, I was asked of the same question (thru SMS) and the burden of answering such question fell like an arrow not only on my dry chaffed lips but also of the republic. Who would have thought that after 19 years (daw) of my confident existence, someone would make me think about this not only twice but thrice. I even resorted to writing this. The conversation went on until it was time for her to sleep.

It was something like...

(December 14, 2006...around 10PM..)

brasil - "what if you waited for your special someone your whole life and learn that no one is waitin' for you. true love is worth takin' chances for. sometimes you don't know why things work out, they just do."

tennis - "hmmm...why things work out? kaw? may sagot ka ba sa why?

brasil - "sabi nga nila, pag mahal mo ang isang tao, hindi kailangan ng reason basta mahal mo siya. pag nagkaroon ng sagot sa tanong na yun, di na yun love...pageant na."

tennis - "hehe! ay ang ganda...not for me. sa akin kailangan may reason. pag nagkatuluyan kami ni ma--t o ni naka-- s-n, i'l ask bakit niya ako mahal at kailangan may sagot sya haha! bulok style sakin ang just because...i just do eew!. everything has a reason. i believe that includes love."

brasil - "pano pag sinabi na " i don't know, it just hit me... i never believed in forever but i found forever in you" gusto mo talaga ng reason?"

tennis - "aba! eh kung ganun ba ang sasabihin sakin kahit wag na sya magsalita forever pagkatapos...hehe! ang reason kse is like a closure. for clarity parang pag tinanong what do you want to eat? tapos sumagot ng anything...i'm just hungry...ok na yun. gutom naman pala so kakain talaga but then again walang certainty. ano ba talaga gusto nya...same thing. u love just because, puede. but a reason gives it its foundaton di ba? di ba?"

and the rest...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...tulog na..............next time.....

ayt! ayt! but don't we have something we call unconditional? we come not to love a perfect person but we do to love him and his imperfections. the moment you found the reason why you love that particular person, that would no longer be true love. not that i'm telling you to be blinded by his foul actions on you but remember that's what makes him HUMAN...us HUMAN. he commits MISTAKES - we do. he tends to be INSENSITIVE at times - we do. he has inherited SINS - we did too! he's flesh and blood - he's human. we're human. if you have the reasons for loving someone then you might be looking for your perfect pair, your ideal man and i believe...that ideal man doesn't exist. oh yeah! he does but only in the mind.

- I love you because...you're tall

you're handsome

you're rich

you're intelligent

you're talented

What if he doesn't fall on those criteria? Yeah right! You wouldn't love him or like him...fine...but i always thought...Love is being felt by the heart and not being seen by the eyes or being think of by the brain.

- I love you because...you love me too

You're not obliged to reciprocate the love that he has for you. If you don't love him, just let him love you...that would do.

Anyway, nothing really that serious in here. "it takes faith to believe" you don't have to see it - feel it! I think it's a case to case basis, "to each his own" as she said. As for me, when I say I love you, I mean it and I wouldn't make promises I couldn't keep. and...please don't think that I don't understand because I do! I know there really are reasons but I don't want those reasons to be my reasons for loving you...

"MARAMING DAHILAN...TOTOO...AT ANG DAHILAN KO AY IKAW..."

DOES LOVE NEED A REASON?

For a moment I closed my eyes...I contemplated on what could have been the answer. After a few seconds, I opened it...smiled...I found the answer...

- LOVE

I smiled again...found another answer...

-YOU

I LOVE YOU...8

..Relationship: Public or Private?

"love can never be a secret forever..."

How far would you go for love? i don't know! but the moment it hits you, you really just don't know! most of the time, you don't even know that you're in-love. true? yes it is!!!

I really do admire couples who come out in the open and proclaim the kind of relationship that they're having. why? well... they're just so proud of it! who would not be proud if you've got yourself a "beauty na brains pa girl" or a "boy next door." tama? who would not be proud if your guy or your girl is some kind of a "hot property?" and only a chosen few were given that kind of self-gratifying-yet-hard-to-deal-with relationship. self-gratifyig for the simple reason that the relationship makes you feel proud of yourself and of your partner. hard-to-deal kasi you become a "hot item" that everyone's talkin' about and while you're so complacent with your "so far smooth sailing" relationship, somebody's trying to pull him/her away from you. just thank God it didn't came into reality because "malakas ang kapit mo!" or "sige na nga!" mahal ka kasi n'ya!" again... love... you know...

others prefer keeping the relationship away from everybody's "kamalayan" (wd d accent on d 4th syllable). i just don't know! maybe because theirs are not yet legal (earth calling parents!!!) or isn't it that they're not yet ready to face the responsibilities they have the moment they indulge into one. why commit in the first place? hindi kaya... hmMmNNn...

when couples are asked about keeping the relationship a secret, usual responses like "we're not yet sure e..." or "we're not yet ready e..." or the ever "gasgas na drama," "coz we want to keep our privacy." come alive. hellerRr!!! ang dami kayang rooms d'yan! sa CR lang private na!!! but seriously, can't you keep your privacy while in the open? (you are actually the one keeping or breaking your privacy) let us make this clear, keeping your relationship in private is not synonymous to keeping it a secret (or your secrets). what are your secrets anyway?! remember that secret and private are two different things. why? aren't you proud of it?!

in cases like the celebrities, they prefer a relationship in "secret." it's a career move you know... moves like the "loveteam" drama... ang pangit nga naman siguro kung may ka-loveteam ka tapos may ka-on ka non-showbiz pa! but isn't it s clear sign of gimmickry? put-ons or something? haay... buhay artista... tsk... tsk...what can you say?

well... i guess this one's "iba." a you and me against the world relationship kept in secret because you really do love him/her and you don't want anybody to be involved in it, get into it, or interfere with it. you don't want to go against culture and tradition and practice your own. you don't want to go against religion and believe your own, and you don't want to go against the society and live on your own. this one i think is really diff. and you should know what it is. after all it's love and it just comes out naturally! it illuminates... it radiates...

no! don't get me wrong (i'll leave that to your imagination) nothing in here really... my mind was just stirred by Y-SPEAK. catch it over studio 23 kabarkada mo!!! every sunday at 7:00 in the PM. speak and be heard...Y-SPEAK! (lintik!!! plugging na itoh!!!)..8

..The Distance Between Us..

I love you so much and that is true and it has never been a secret. I'll do whatever you ask me too. And that same love that I feel for you frustrates me at times that...

- I can't wrap my arms around you
- Whisper at your tender ears
- Cuddle you close to me
- To be beside you during your times of doubt and uneasiness
- To see you through good and bad times
- To lift you up during your deepest lows or
- To caress your tender loving face

Sometimes I resort to imagining you with me, doing the things that we love the most...

- doing fun activities together
- walking frantically
- laughing laudably
- crying
- talking
- sharing happy moments
- gazing into each other's eyes and
- even staring at each other

We are very much apart but through it all, we managed to remain close and become even much closer each and everyday. Miles can never break that special bond between us. That distance frustrating me is the same distance that keeps me holding on. So if you're feeling sad and blue, remember that I'm feeling the same way too and always remember that I do care...

I can no longer imagine the world without you and me...8

..Love & Like: The Difference Between..

try to figure this out and ask yourself.

when you like someone, your heart beats faster but when you love someone, you're happy!

when you like someone, winter is just beautiful winter but when you love someone, it feels like springtime in winter (just like the song)

when you're looking at someone you like, you blush but when you look at someone that you love, you smile (hmmnn...)

when you like someone, you can't say everything in your mind but when you love someone, you can!

when you like someone, you tend to get shy but when you love someone, you show your own self.

when there is the presence of someone you like, you can't look at him/her straight in the eye but with the presence of someone you love, you can always look at him/her with a smile...

when the person that you like is crying, you cry with him/her but when the person that you love is the one crying, you may kill for him/her...???

the kind of feeling that you have for the person that you like starts from the ear but the feeling for the person that you love starts from the eye.

so if that time comes that you finally want to stop liking the person that you used to like, all you've got to do is to cover your ears but if you'll try to close your eyes and that moment happens, the love that you have for him/her will turn into a tear flowing down your cheek and that will remain forever in your heart...

define yours...8

Subtle Press Release..

friday, 1130 pm, sittin' all alone in an empty chair, my mind's bogged down by the thought of you, i looked through the glass and rain began to pour. as the tears dried up my cheek, i began to wonder, "why am i alone?" i missed those days when you were still with me, when we used to enjoy each other's company. i really did have a great time everytime you smiled, i really did have a great time everytime you entered my mind. 2 hours had passed, i was still searchin' for you, waiting for a single message from you. how i loved those quotes, how i loved those care, how i loved those exchanges that would last till the end of day. i knew...you knew... and we both knew that time was against us and we're actually chasing it and now that you have someone even closer than i, i am afraid of loving you for i might break apart...ooppss...wait...i can now hear a sound...nah! it's just another missedcall...8

Aisle of View

loving someone is such a wonderful feeling and it becomes even more wonderful when reciprocated but what happens if the kind of love that you are giving is not even appreciated? it hurts...i know...and that's true especially if you know that the person you're in love with feels the same way...for you. mutual? yes! but...''the other'' can't go on with a life and can't even tie a relationship with you. there even came a point that choosing became ''the other's'' option. unfortunately, it went the other way. the only consolation you've got was being a part of the selection. ''you told me you love me, that i am important to you then why does it have to be like this? i just don't get it! you could have chosen me and yet...ok! you don't want to hurt me but you actually are hurting me! you're killing me softly and even burrying me 20 feet under slowly. if i could just turn back the hands of time, i wish i never met you but then again...never in anybody's life that time was unfair. while some others hoped for something like this, like the one we have (that i don't even know where to stand), i have it and i am really hurting signifying that i am sharing those stolen moments with you. and eventhough i am hurting, i'll never be sorry for loving you. eventhough i am hurting, i'll still keep on living. and eventhough i am hurting, i'll still be loving you... even in silence...

(espesyali dedikeyted tu ey clows frend of mayn)..8

Bedrock

in maintaining/sustaining a relationship, both must always understand each other's expectations. blame must never be a part of the system and guilt must be left and avoided. be ready of forthcoming insecurities. from minor grievances into resentments come pressure-packed situations that would develop into simple yet explosive confrontations. then time will demand you to be together and sometimes to be apart. it's a good sign if you could control the urgency and the feeling to keep the situation and further complications under control. most of all, remember of one another's individuality and identity that "you are still you" bear in mind that you are two different people simply sharing and binding a single time..8

Unintentional False Hopes

''there are things that aren't suppose to happen or rather occur but again choices are not of service to us but rather we are made of service to unexpected choices."

by just saying that, for sure things are now beginning to come into your risky mind that somehow you have just delivered false hopes to someone...not just anybody else...but to someone of so much importance to you.

being in a situation like that would definitely make one think and ask: what is it really about me? there must really be that something. in one's case, that something is unidentifiable and i do understand (that's what i always do). when it comes to feelings, as much as possible, i don't want to interfere! in the first place, what do i really know abour your feelings? for other people who doesn't even know what the heck is goin' on they would definitely think that you are someone who doesn't care! caring has always been in your system the reason why you can't afford to hurt someone but by simply doing so, you're unconsciously hurting him by giving him that little glimmer of hope brought about by your actions and you're out to tell the whole world (if you can) "that's not what i meant" again i do understand. of course there came a point that you really wanted to end this all up but it's not that easy but how could you give another start if you don't know how to end it? and ending doesn't mean that you also stop loving him but ending to stop hurting him. i might sound so crazy and stupid but if it's the proper thing to do then do it!!!

the world is really paradoxical: we need to go down to be able to go up; we need to be separated to be together; we need to live with the past to live with the present and the future; and most of all, we need to let go to let it all in...8